The Art of Negotiation

I was talking to a legendary ninja the other day. His fame and reputation is renowned among ninja dojos, even the great Buddha heard of him. You see, He is not your normal everyday ninja who unlike normal ninjas, only knows how to turn invisible. He is well known for his negotiation skills. He was once a terrorist negotiator working for a secret government agency. (He got bored of his job and decided to be a ninja because he prefers assassination over negotiation)
Anyways, we were drinking ninja coffee while debating on the subject of negotiation. It wasn't a pretty sight. I was a hard-headed ninja and I have my own philosophies on life and similarly, he had his. The discussion got so heated that at one point I was at a losing streak. Out of anger, I drew out my katana.

And this guy, he was good! As I was about to deliver a killing blow with my katana, he stood firm and negotiated his way out of danger.

"If you put down your katana, I'll let you in one of my secrets." he whispered. And sure enough, I sheath in my katana and I'm all ears.

And this is what he told me:
Negotiation is an exchange. To give something in return for something.
A good way to negotiate is to phrase your sentence:
"If I [...] then you [...]. Ok?" (eg: If I visit your blog, then you give me a comment, ok?)

An even better way to negotiate is to phrase your sentence like this:
"If you [...] then I will [...]" (eg: If you give me a comment then I will visit your blog.)

By turning the sequence of [you] and [I], it produce a different effect. One thing to note here is 'People are more likely to remember the last sentence.'

Lets compare to the two styles:

If I [...] then you [...]. Ok? (If I visit your blog, then you drop me a comment, ok?)	If you [...] then I will [...] (If you drop me a comment then I will visit your blog.)
Because the last point is more memorable than the first , the other party is obliged to commit to the deal. No one likes obligation. It is as if they are being forced.	Because the last point is more memorable than the first point, You are implying commitment from your side. You are committed to the deal. (Thumbs up!)
Because the focus is on the other party, they'll think twice before committing to a deal. Thinking twice means hesitation.	Because of your definite commitment to the deal, the other party will be more likely to give in and cooperate. (Thumbs up!)
Rating: Thumbs Down	Rating: Thumbs Up!

Remember:  If you [drop me a comment] then I [will visit your blog].
Give it a try and drop a comment if it works for you.

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If you drop me a comment, I'll visit your blog. Deal?